Marriage

I like sports. I get pretty excited about games, trades, dramatic happenstances and what have you that center around the world of sports. Naturally, I like listening to people that know about sports. In the world of sports commentators and pundits, there are 2 guys that I listen to more than anyone else; Tim Kurkjian - a baseball analyst for ESPN and Colin Cowherd - host of The Herd radio program on ESPN radio. Cowherd is probably the most entertaining sports personality and is quickly becoming a "sports media icon". His style is fresh and his opinions are well-reasoned and buttressed by actual stats. He is a smart guy. But, on his program this morning, Colin talked about how he and his wife of 11 years had decided to divorce. Being a married dude, I am not a big fan of divorce but I am resigned to the fact that it happens and is happening more and more. What was alarming about this guy's announcement was his tone and attitude toward the subject. He used a line from Shawshank Redemption to almost justify the decision. "Get busy living or get busy dying." Cowherd said that he and the Mrs. had just grown apart and that they were "dying". So, they had decided to split. They are apparently friends and still enjoy each other's company; Cowherd even bought a house right down the street from her. He said that marriage was hard and that he couldn't imagine "keeping something" for the next 50 years. That statement floored me.

For a guy that talks so much about people not "getting it" in the world of sports, Cowherd has totally missed the boat on that which matters. A spouse is not a thing you keep around. Marriage isn't like a lamp that sits around until it goes out of style. It is a living organism of a relationship that grows and adds depth and melds itself into the fabric of your existance. When it is the way it was designed, marriage makes you forget how to be single. Krisi and I have been married for 5 years and together as a couple for the better part of a decade. With the separation rate growing as it is, we are considered marriage veterans. My individual identity can no longer be separated from her. This relationship augments me. Under its canopy, I can withstand a little more of what the world can throw at me, I can extend a little more care to the people around me, and I can look a little more like the Son.

It is the most spiritually perfect of human relationships, not a lamp; not a stagnant legal relationship but a microchosm of the love relationship between the Creator God and the created beloved. Some guys just don't get it...